Having successfully defeated the angry mushroom, the group decided to celebrate by peeing in a corner... until someone pointed out that the room was round. So they decided not to pee at all. Ever. Again. Except for Yuri, who missed the memo and peed down the well as the monk opened the door on the other side of the round room from where they’d entered.
Beyond the door another narrow corridor extended fifteen feet ahead, ending in another door which opened onto a spiral staircase which went up.
“Okay guys,” Frelik muttered, “nobody said anything about stairs. Can we go back and wait out the storm yet?”
Davros sighed and headed for the stairs but Reytard stopped him, “Perhaps we should clear out this level first and prevent anything coming up on us from… behind?” He winked.
After a moment’s contemplation Davros rolled his eyes and nodded, “Fine, let’s check the rest of this level first.”
They returned to the statue of the Runelord of Envy and headed down the next narrow corridor to their left. There they found another small, oddly shaped room with a dais and altar against the left-hand wall. As Reytard and Frelik approached the opening to the room, they could hear a high-pitched, violent discussion rising from within; voices chittering as though they were arguing about something.
Failing in their attempt to sneak, Frelik, Reytard and Cyrano rounded the corner into the room to find five goblins who had leapt to their feet, scattering dice as they took up their dog slicers and horse choppers. A crude jack-o-lantern sat on the altar bearing the barely recognizable face of a goblin.
The nearest goblin levelled a polearm at Reytard and yelled, “Hey! Who are you!”
Before Reytard could act on whatever foolish plan he’d come up with Davros stepped into the room and said in goblin, “We’re sheltering from the cinderstorm. What are you doing in here?”
The goblins made interested noises and looked him up and down, “We were sent here to guard for our master.”
“What are you guarding?” Davros asked.
One of the goblins said, “We’re protecting our master who is – “
Another goblin clapped a hand across the first one’s mouth, “Don’t tell them our master’s in the next room!”
“Can we speak with your master?” Davros sighed, rolling his eyes.
“Our master is great and powerful. His name is Orpheus.”
Davros pointed to his goblin-snake tie, “Does he look like this.”
Upon seeing the tie the goblins exchanged worried glances and shifted back and forth uncomfortably.
Magpie waved his hands, “It’s not what you think, it’s an illusion.”
They didn’t seem to believe him, instead addressing Davros, “Why you make that? Why you wear that?”
“Because we’re devout worshippers.” Davros lied, “And this is my homage.”
Without so much as a moment’s hesitation the goblin’s nodded in unison, “Oooh.”
“So can we see the great and powerful Orpheus?” Davros asked.
“Yes, of course, he will be pleased.” A goblin nodded, banging on the door.
A distant voice called out, “What?”
“There’s someone to see the master!”
“What?”
“The master!”
“What?”
“Let us in!”
The door swung open a crack and a goblin head popped out, “What?”
“People to see the master.”
“Hey master! People!” The interior goblin shouted over his shoulder as he pulled the door open.
The group entered a huge room which resembled nothing more than an underground cathedral with spiky runes on the walls and polished skulls balanced on spikes. On the main level was a round pool, the far end of the room was a raised dais with a triangle-shaped pool filled with some sort of bubbling liquid which burbled quietly. Next to it stood a goblin-snake wearing a gold crown and a red velvet cape, gold rings adorning its tail - Orpheus. A sinspawn stood on the dais across the pool from Orpheus.
The room seemed to be mostly dedicated to Lamashtuu, the runes on the walls looking mostly like they were dedicated to transforming creatures into other creatures.
As the group entered the snake addressed them in common, “Well now mortals, welcome to Orpheus’ domain. Have you brought tribute?”
“Yes.“ Frelik muttered, “I’ve brought ‘gifts’.”
“Yes, we’ve brought tribute.” Davros nodded.
“Hmm. That is wise.” The snake muttered, as the sinspawn eyed the group strangely. “One of you will bring forward what you offer me and set it at the base of my dais.”
Frelik pushed his way to the front, reverently approaching the dais, before drawing his scimitar at the last second and swinging it at the sinspawn and missing.
“Horror and betrayal!” Shrieked the goblin snake, “Kill them! Kill them all!”
A shot rang out from the hall in response, followed by a goblin scream and a wet thump.
Davros hurled a sticky bomb, successfully nicking both the snake and the sinspawn.
Reytard whirled and attacked the goblins behind him, too angry and confused to deal with the snake-thing.
The snake backed off and hissed, his eyes blazing red before a fan-shaped blast of flame burst from them, raking the party.
Davros caught the brunt of the flame attack, which even managed to set his armor on fire, leaving him looking a bit like used-up charcoal.
Olivine, never one to be outdone, responded with her own fan of flame, catching the two goblins standing in the doorway - who promptly darted forward into the room to attack the Halfling, too terrified of Olivine’s dog to take their frustrations out on her.
The sinspawn landed a solid bite on Frelik’s arm, but otherwise couldn’t seem to get through the barbarian’s defenses.
Valeria loaded another bullet, blowing the head of one of the goblins into a fine red mist.
Davros, meanwhile, hurled a bomb at his own feet for no apparent reason, gave up, and drew his mace.
Reytard managed to put down another goblin as the goblin-snake backed off and lashed at Davros, landing a solid bite and yelling, “You’ve been poisoned, my friend, POISONED!!”
Davros simply looked down at his tie then back up at his opponent, “Funny, that’s what he said too.”
One of the goblins shrieked and swung at Reytard, but Magpie got his katana underneath the weapon, snapping it in twain. With another shriek the creature began looking around for a way out.
Waving his tie and making mocking noises about being poisonous Davros swung his mace at the snake, missing horribly due to all his taunting.
With another mutter, Orpheus backed off and blinked, muttering something dire sounding before a blast of flame once again burst from his face.
After a few more exchanges Frelik finally managed to put down the sinspawn as Reytard killed the last goblin.
Upon seeing all of his subjects dead or unconscious, Orpheus shrieked, “No! My empire!” Plonking off the dais and lasering people with his gaze he continued, “Die, accursed fools, die!”
Valeria loaded another bullet and fired at the ‘emperor’, her bullet striking the snake in the head and blasting it backwards, leaving the tiny gold crown to hover momentarily in the air before dropping to the ground with a rattle.
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